Rough but would not be without…

I am stronger than I give myself credit for
And yet, I am weaker than people think
Weak might not be the right word
But I do cry many tears

Some tears out of joy
Some tears out of pain
Some tears out of laughs
But every tear is important

I wish I travelled the world
I wish I already finished school
I wish I had a garden
I wish I had more adventures

Travelled the world to tell you the cultural stories
An education so we had more money
A garden you could play in
Adventures just for all the laughs

But then I think about it all over again
And realize that I do not need those things
Because I have YOU
And you; are my world, my education, my garden full of adventures

Sometimes I feel alone
Sometimes I miss your spoken words
I wish you could say ‘mommy’ again
I wish I could make everything okay

But then I think about it all over again
And realize you are speaking to me every day
You do call me mommy when you look deep into my eyes
What is in the word ‘okay’?

People tell me all the time ‘how do you deal?’
People tell me my life is rough
People tell me how proud they are
People smile and some do not

I deal because I have to deal
Rough life? Yes, sometimes
But it is the roughness that makes me proud
You smiling is the only thing that matters

Visits to the hospitals are no fun
Spending hours on the internet
Searching for clues or answers
Gives me a lot of worries and sleepless nights

But every day is our adventure
The good and the bad
The dark times are brightening up
Because you are fighting every day

This might be a silly poem
But I mean every word
Tobias, my son; you are just perfect
The way YOU are.

foto 5

About majasf

Single mom
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